In our aging society, men are adapting to new domestic roles
(February 22, 2007) The Democrat and Chronicle recently reported on the federal Lifespan Respite Care Act, signed into law in late December. The act provides easier access to respite services for the rapidly increasing number of individuals who provide in-home care for ill family members.
More than 40 million Americans currently care for ill family members with chronic illness or disability, and their ranks are expected to continue growing dramatically due to increased longevity and the growing population of aging baby boomers.
As a result, it is not surprising that caregivers comprise increasingly various and diverse population groups. One of the most rapidly growing groups of caregivers is men: husbands, sons, brothers and other male relatives who care for elderly family members and partners.
Across age groups and types of illness or disability, close to 30 percent of all in-home care is provided by men, predominantly elderly men who care for ill spouses, and their ranks are predicted to grow as men live longer and conceptions of family and gender roles continue to broaden.
Research in the social sciences has explored family caregiving since the early 1980s, yet the unique strengths and challenges of male caregivers have been under-examined, minimized or ignored altogether. In many early studies, care that men provided was seen as inferior and substandard. In other studies, men were actually seen as abdicating their responsibilities when demands of caregiving grew.
Although men represent a rapidly growing percentage of family caregivers, recent research into their experiences remains sporadic at best. In the few studies that exist, however, it is suggested that the quality of care or the commitment to caregiving is undeniable, even if the “style” of caregiving may be considered non-traditional. Since 1997, I have researched the experiences of elderly male caregivers in the Rochester area who care for wives or other family members with cognitive impairment related to Alzheimer’s-type dementia, stroke or brain injury. Their experiences are compelling and unique.
For many elderly male caregivers, personal histories reflect an era in which gender roles and expectations were explicit and clearly defined, especially relating to work there was men’s work and there was women’s work.
When first faced with the caregiving role, understandably, most elderly men are more comfortable with the types of care with which they are most familiar, such as physical home maintenance and repair, lawn and garden care, providing transportation, maintaining the family car, managing family finances, etc. Tasks in the home traditionally done by women, however, are often daunting.
Meal planning and preparation, for instance, is a challenge for many men, although in differing ways. For some, planning and preparing meals is a journey into strange and untried terrain, in any context.
Knowing what and how much to buy, and how to prepare it are new and unfamiliar undertakings.
Providing “hands-on” personal care is the area of caregiving with which many elderly men struggle most; bathing, dressing and coping with incontinence are tasks with which they have little experience or preparation.
Some struggle, but, with time, most men are able to provide personal care that is skillful, heartfelt and done out of devotion, not mere duty.
Directly related to the Lifespan Respite Care Act, studies suggest that male caregivers are willing to use respite services more than their female counterparts and, as a result, experience less caregiver burnout.
Similarly, studies suggest that men are adept in organizing outside services and care assistance to augment their own efforts, an ability perhaps imported from employment experience.
The Lifespan Respite Care Act bodes well in meeting the growing need for assistance to those who provide care to ill family and friends.
It is particularly important to remember that when ill family members are placed into institutional care, it is more likely due to deterioration in the physical and emotional health of the caregiver, not the care receiver.
It is equally essential that we remain aware that the needs of caregivers are as varied and diverse as the individuals who provide this much needed work.
The world of male caregivers is a reminder that one size does not fit all.
Russell is an assistant professor at the Greater Rochester Collaborative Master of Social Work Program.
Miss Hendi LINGIAH
Clinical Psychologist