Lean on Me

Lean on Me, by Lorraine Kember

(A Book Review by Radhika Gupte)

A book, a piece of literature, a poem to be critically acclaimed or appreciated has to be first understood in its depth and entirety. “Lean on Me” is a superbly and beautifully written account of a cancer caregiver that transcends the harsh and hopeless realities of cancer and emerges like the smooth flow of a crystal clear rivulet which may appear insignificant and yet brings joy to every object it touches.

It is an extremely articulate account in the form of diary notes interspersed with simple yet beautiful poems. The book touches each and every human feeling-the finer ones as well as the darkest ones. The emotions described will touch any care givers heart and make them identify with the author. All along the journey that she undertook as a caregiver for her husband afflicted with cancer, the power of positive thinking which may seem to fail sometimes, is given primary importance. As is a very important factor-love for the patient which enhances human capacity. Equipped with these, the fight against the disease, the fight to help your loved one lead a quality life can become a unique experience. It is no exaggeration to say that the book can be a guide to caregivers who often become confused, desolate or depressed and unable to cope with the situation.

Equally amazing is the author’s account of highly technical medical protocols. She studied this aspect in detail, discussed the anticipated side effects with the doctor and thus armed herself with a complete knowledge of the treatment. She stresses the importance of palliative care and shares the relief she felt when her husband was under the care of the Palliative Care Unit at the Silver Chain Hospice Care Service. It is clear that the author left no stone unturned to make her beloved husband’s life as comfortable, happy and meaningful as possible.

Coping with the realisation that you are sharing the last days of someone dear to you requires immense grit and strength. While describing the total dedication she invested in the care of the patient, the author also emphasises that the caregiver owes it to him/herself not to neglect their own health, feelings and well being.

The book, which set out to be a simple narration of day to day life of a cancer patient ends up being a motivational force for all those faced with the unfortunate situation of witnessing a loved one suffer.

(The reviewer lost her husband of over 40 years to cancer on 5th July 2005. On a personal note she wrote: I am thankful that I got a chance to read “Lean on Me”, a wonderful book which I might not have been inclined to read at present. But the book soothed and embalmed my grief stricken mind to a certain extent.)

From the Author:

My husband passed away from pleural mesothelioma in December 2001.  Upon his diagnosis, he was given a prognosis of three to nine months.  He survived for two years, during which I cared for him at home until his death. I have written a book about our journey through his terminal illness  – sharing my knowledge and experience regarding:  Anticipatory Grief, Pain Management and Symptom Control, Chemotherapy, Palliative Care and Dying at home- plus excerpts and poems from my personal diary, in the hope of bringing inspiration and strength to others.

I invite you to visit my website http://www.cancerthroughacarerseyes.jkwh.com where you will find: Detailed information, Doctor’s recommendations, Book excerpts and Reviews, plus reader’s letters.
 
I am sincere in my wish to bring inspiration and strength to others.  I would like to point out that although my experience has come from caring for my husband with mesothelioma cancer, I have written my book in the hope of bringing inspiration and strength to those who have, and particularly those who care for, loved ones with ALL forms of cancer.  I know the helplessness experienced upon diagnosis and the strength I found when I came to realize that although I could not stop my husband from dying, I could help him to live.  This through my acquired knowledge of pain management and symptom control. My  insight and discussion regarding pain management and symptom control and the emotional journey of caring for a terminally ill loved one, as portrayed by the inclusion of excerpts and poems from my personal diary, applies on a broad scale.
 
I would also like to mention at this point that although I have written my book with the carer in a home environment in mind; I have been informed that “Lean on Me”, is also a valuable resource for those who are undertaking a career in Palliative Care and for those who are already working within it.  I have letters of support in testament to this and will be pleased to supply them to you if you would like.
 
Readers are encouraged to keep the information and website link on hand to pass on to those who you come in contact with those who are currently on a journey such as the author has travelled.

Lean on Me:

Inspirational True Story of a loving wife’s emotional journey as she cares for her terminally ill husband and improves the quality of his life.  Includes Cancer Pain Management, Coping with Grief – Plus Excerpts and Poems from wife’s personal diary. Highly recommended by the Cancer Council.

Source:http://www.cpaaindia.org/infocentre/bookreview.htm#JOY