Here a quack, there a quack
every where a quack quack.
— a poem by Dr. Leo Rebello
At the Quack Conference organised
by Quackery International
there were more than 10,000 quacks
all paid for by the “phamous” (p)harmaceuticals
I can repair your brain quack
I can repair your heart quack
I can repair your kidneys quack
I can replace your knee quack
I can operate your piles quack
I can treat your pimples quack.
Quack quack they did all morning
Then they all broke for lunch.
Over the lunch they did more quack, quack
with colas, beers and dead goats,
chickens and ducks. Till a spoil-sport
vegetarian quack reminded them that
they may get Bird Flu if they ate dead birds
injected by Tamy Flu.
Afternoon session of quacks
consisted of further quack quack
First spoke Cancer quack
Then spoke Diabetes quack
Then spoke Hypertension quack
The Asthma quack carried his
pump and went on quack, quack
quack till a young quack snatched
his pump to make him stop his quack.
At the Valedictory session spoke a
Spiritually evolved quack of
Body, Mind and Spirit Holism.
But the “spare parts dealers” not accustomed
to such quack started walking away
uttering quack quack, quack quack.
Here a quack, there a quack
Everywhere a quack quack
Sang the slum children outside
the Quack-Quack conference venue